Hi Honey,

Well, it has been 3 years today since you found out what I still wonder about.

I still don’t know where you are now. If you are somewhere where you can hear me then I know you have heard me speaking to you every day for these last three years. If you are somewhere where you know my thoughts then I know you have known mine, every day.

If you are somewhere where you can feel then I know you have felt the abiding love for you I have in me and the poignant sadness I feel because you are not here with me. I know at night you have felt me move my hand across the cold sheet next to me seeking your warmth, have felt me squeeze your invisible hand before I say goodnight to you, have heard me say, every night, the last thing I say at the end of every day.

I love you.

I hear your voice often. I hear your laugh, I see your eyes. There are times when we share our knowing nod to one another in moments when we are together and connected in calm and beautiful natural places. The woods, the mountains, the river and ocean.

Yet you are not here, and I don’t know where you are. I don’t know where I will be when I go, gladly, to join you.

I do, however, have a picture of it which I know will please you, and make you laugh that happy laugh of yours I hear every day. It comes from what you told me before you died of what you felt would come next.

You are, and we will be, together, a happy little vapor flying around in the big ol’ physics of the universe.

I love you.